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Friday, February 11, 2011

On Expectations...

Let me preface this, friends, by forewarning you I am not in the best of moods as I sit down to write tonight. I suppose everyone is entitled to a grumpy day now and then, but I try not to put my grumps on my blog. That being is not a day I'm trying...I'm going to least somewhat...anyways. Because I can.

Expectations. Big word, no? I'm sitting on both sides of the fence tonight on this one. Perhaps that's where my frustration comes from...I'm frustrated on both sides! I guess today's my day, eh?

Let's first look at the side of the "expector", if you will. As the expector, I am a firm believer that you can, to some extent, control the behavior of the...?...expectee? Yes, expectee. I believe, and think I could write a thesis on this subject, that the expectee will, if not right away, eventually live either UP to your expectations, or DOWN to your expectations. I also believe that if you are expecting in the right fashion, for the good of the expectee, you are expecting them to live UP to your expecations, rather than down. This being said, and stating that I am of the "UP" belief, after believing UP in someone and investing a lot of time in them because you see they are worth it, and getting the DOWN instead...well, folks, to be as nice as I can think to be at the moment...the best thing I can say is it bites. Disappointment, I should think, is something that most of us are not fond of. When you couple disappointment with the DOWN behavior from the expectee,'s not too pretty, as you could imagine. Here's the part I have to get better about: I have to get better about voicing the disappointment in a teaching manner, rather than an "I'm-hurt-that-you-disappointed-me" manner. There have been times in my life that I have disappointed, sometimes in a bigger way than others, I'm sure, but those that were in teaching roles for me either handled it in a teaching manner (thanks, you who taught!), or handled it in the "I-m-hurt-that-you-disappointed-me" manner (definitely not the manner you wish to be remembered, trust me).

Now, to the other side of the fence. Let me forward this with this statement: I am by no means perfect. Yes, I know this will come as a huge shock to most of you readers out there, but it is true. I am perfect. :0) BIIIIIIG Grin! OK, really...even IIIIIII have room for improvement. :) But!!! You know how when you really feel like you are giving it all you have, and then some, and you continue to do and to do and to do, and you just want to look at the expector and go, "HEY!!!! You!!!!! Can you not SEEEE what all it is I HAVE done????? Can you not see that your expectations are too great for even the Pope to live up to????" But alas, dear reader, I think I would be remiss if I didn't point out that that is NOT the correct way to handle the situation. What? You already knew that? Good, cause so did I. But don't you WANT to say that sometimes? But then instead, you tie a knot and hang on, right? Why yes, you do! Because if you are a good little expectee, and you try to live UP to the expectations of the expector, you just keep smiling. And trying. And doing. Even when you might feel taken advantage of, or under-appreciated, or under-paid, or under-thanked, or whatever the case may be...insert your under-____ here. This does, however, remind me to reevaluate my expectations as the expector, because it can't be too fun being the expectee, either. Right?? Right.

Now, I feel all better. Enough of expectors, expectees, and expectations. It's time for bed. Thanks to your listening ear, I think I shall sleep a little bit better with all those words *not* roaming around in my noggin.

Happy Friday, dear reader. I shall make it my goal to have a happier post on the morrow.
And because no blog post is a blog post without a photo, here is Carter-Bug with a smile for you today. Ain't he just the cutest thing ever?

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